The Fine Print

According to the software version of TCOYF, my due date is July 26, 2008 with a range of July 18 until August 4 as an acceptable delivery date range.

How am I feeling? I felt pukey this morning. There was a few minutes there that I was checking out the placement of every waste paper basket as I walked thru the office. Otherwise, I'm ok.

Why did I decide to do the pregnancy test?
  1. My period was late - in and of itself this isn't a guarantee with me that something should be checked. I went 47 days without a period when I had an ovarian cyst a few months ago. Additionally, I've skipped periods in the past. But over the last few months, it's been pretty reliable.
  2. I've been very weepy lately. I cry at the drop of a hat right now. Not at all like me. I'm more of an angry woman than a weepy woman. Over the last couple of weeks, I've sobbed like a baby over coffee commercials, sermons on podcasts, and the lack of toothpaste in the house.
  3. I feel "full" - not like I usually do when it's time for my period, but a little lower and a little less unpleasant.
  4. I'm peeing more often. I only pee like 3 or 4 times a day. Once in the morning when I get up, once around lunch time and once after I get home from work. I must have a bladder the size of Minneapolis. However, lately, I've gotten quite uncomfortable if I try to delay getting to the potty. Not like, "I will die from the pain of a bladder infection" kind of discomfort, but more like, "I really need to move towards the potty in the very near future" kind of discomfort.
  5. I had a "feeling" that I should check.

I took a nap on Sunday afternoon and when I awoke, I thought "I need to take a pregnancy test. Thank goodness I have two of them!" At the time I took it, I think I was thinking more like I usually do when I test that it would be confirmation that my body isn't doing what it's supposed to be doing and I just need to keep an eye on things.

When I saw the pregnancy test, I had a hard time understanding what I was looking at. I usually see "NOT PREGNANT" on this type of test and at first, I couldn't understand where the NOT was. But the NOT was noticeably absent. At this point, I called Moo to come downstairs.

"Hey Moo. You need to come down here right now."

Moo comes down the stairs from the bedroom. I point at the bathroom. "You need to look at that and tell me what it means".

Moo told me later that he walked in expecting to see the squirrel that's been running laps in our attic dead in the bathroom. Instead, he saw a small test kit with PREGNANT in the window.

I want to tell everyone!

This is terrible.

I want to tell the whole world that I'm knocked up! Why am I too frightened? I've told my boss and I've told a couple of people close to me here at work that knew that I was trying to conceive. Moo wants to wait until the end of the first trimester I think.. how will I live until then!?!?

We're going to Moo's parent's house for the Thanksgiving holiday and I'm gonna be jumping to tell them. I've always had this fantasy of how I was going to break the news to my parents and my inlaws.

I would have a copy of the first ultrasound picture in a beautiful little frame and then wrap up the frame. As my mother/mother in law, open up the little frame, I'd watch the confusion as they look at the weird picture in the frame and then as comprehension became apparent, I'd say "guess what? We're PREGNANT!!"

Since we won't be able to visit Moo's parents at Christmas and because I won't have the first ultrasound until at least January my little plans aren't working like I wanted. We'll probably still tell them since there's no way in hell that I'll be able to keep my mouth shut and that'll have to be good enough.

Woo Woo Woo Woo Woo!

Ok now that I'm thinking a little more logically. HOLY CHRIST! I'm PREGNANT!!! This is the most unbelievable thing EVER!! Woo Woo Woo Woo Woo!

Much better.

Moo has been using the testosterone gel - it looks like snot and smells like rubbing alcohol - for just a couple of weeks. According to our doc, this stuff is supposed to take 6-8 MONTHS for full effectiveness and could take that long before Moo's sperm count is up to snuff.

However, with that in mind, it's important to remember that it only takes one SPERM to fight his way thru the mighty tundra of my hoo-ha!

Back on November 1, I experienced some significant cervical mucus. I mean, this stuff stretched 6 inches and was snot like in consistency. Just perfect according to TCOYF. So of course, I jumped Moo as soon as I got him home.

And the result is the tiny blob now chugging thru my hoo-ha for the next 8 months or so. 4 weeks... only 36 to go!


Excuse me while I go change my undies. These are full of fecal matter.